Monday, August 13, 2012

CITY v CHELSEA: CRUMBS AND FRAGMENTS

HAZARD LIGHTS
Clearly, after a summer inflating himself with a bicycle pump, Eden Hazard is now so much of a gas-filled obstacle that he ended up performing in glorious isolation in the middle of the park a sumptuous silent tribute to the spirit of Johnny Bumstead. Tik-tak-a-ploof. A paltry contribution ended in the ignominy of substitution in front of many hundreds of small children offering him the traditional Mancunian hand gesture of considered consolation.

SECOND SEASON SYNDROME
Nasri and Tevez both look like they are ready to increase their sway on MCFC affairs this season. Nasri started slowly and grew into the game, Tevez buzzed until finally unleashing the shot of the day past a rooted Peter Cech. Promising beginnings from a striker who can be considered a new signing after his season off.

FINANCIAL DOPING
Was the way one punter described Rodwell's purchase. Prepare yourselves for the arrival of Twitter's finest brainless warriors. On first sighting, a useful addition to the squad, Rodwell joins a group that - on this evidence - is plainly good enough without any great additions being made. Chelsea must have been alarmed to see a less than full strength City side pass them off the park for the first half hour of the 2nd half when three ultra precise goals put paid to their promising start. That they finished just a goal adrift, they should thank their lucky stars.

COSTEL PANDEMONIMOM
Not the busiest of days for the tree-sized Romanian, but the one question that was asked produced a fluffed response, the big man going down like a block of flats and seemingly unable to move his trunk to a ball that was closer to him than the eventual scorer Ryan Bertrand.

OLYMPIAN HANGOVER
A few medals:
Middle Distance Abuse Hurling: gold -John Terry; silver Ashley Cole; bronze Frank Lampard
Platform Diving. gold - Eden Hazard
For the High Jump: gold Costel Pandemonium; silver Kolo Touré
Precision shooting: gold Carlos Tevez; silver Yaya Touré; bronze Samir Nasri
Triple salko backflip with dive: tin Eden Hazard
Greco Wrestling: gold Branislav Ivanovic (Serbia)
Long Distance Running: gold James Milner
Smallbore: gold Andy Townsend

NOT JUST A BIG OBSTACLE
As stated over a year ago here a period in the New Year without Yaya Touré is already, at this unfeasibly early stage, not something to look forward to. It is a feat worth pausing over to match size, power and strength with agility, nimbleness and speed, but the big man does this with aplomb.

NEW IMPROVED KOLAROV!
Faster, more accurate, gets into the places that ordinary left sided raiders fail to penetrate. Or the same old Kolarov, used in a system that actually shows up his strengths rather than isolates him in no-man's land, lost somewhere between dangerous attacking opposition right winger and dangerous attacking right sided fullback?

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